Getting Legally Married in San Francisco City Hall

Sharing why we “eloped” and the logistics behind the process

In September 2023, Meet and I decided to get legally married in San Francisco - just us two. We’re both very low-key and simple people and hate being the center of attention. Initially, we wanted to elope in Hawaii and have a small Indian wedding with our parents and siblings. That idea was swiftly replaced with a multi-event Indian wedding week. While I was really excited for certain parts like having my bridal henna done and seeing my family from England, I was filled with anxiety because the typical notion of an Indian bride just isn’t “me”, and I really don’t have too much of an interest for all the clothes, jewelry, rituals and gift giving.

I felt that having our Indian wedding + legal marriage on the same day put too much stress on me and I wanted to stay true to what we wanted from the start - something small. I’m so glad we made the decision and stayed strong when telling our parents (because they certainly weren’t thrilled) that we were going through with the court wedding.

It was hard for me to accept my parents’ initial reaction but as we grow and become our own person, not having the same thoughts and ideals as those who raised us is completely normal. I knew my decision was a surprise to them, but I wasn’t hurting them or saying no to having an Indian wedding - and that’s something I told myself when having feelings of guilt leading up to the day. (But obviously my parents came around and are still my besties lol ❤️❤️❤️)

Being legally married and having that piece done made me feel so much at ease for our Indian wedding, I was able to treat it as a celebration with all our family and friends and truly enjoy it. San Francisco was the first place we called home together and I love that it’s also where we got married. I guess this is my long-winded way of saying that you owe it to yourself to make decisions for your own happiness and what you want, even if it isn’t in line with the expectation others have of you.

Okay now onto the actual logistics - these are specific to San Francisco but I assume most cities in Canada and the US have the same process. For all folks outside those areas - please do your research!

This link for SF folks is super easy to follow: https://www.sf.gov/step-by-step/get-married-san-francisco 

Obtain a marriage license

You need to complete a marriage license application and take it into City Hall - the application was easy to fill out but did take some confirmation from our parents on their details. We then took the filled-out application to our appointment at City Hall, bright and early on a Monday morning, and the clerk verified the information and gave us the next steps for our legal marriage appointment. 

It’s important to note that from this appointment date, your marriage date has to be within 90 days - I would recommend booking both the license and marriage appointments ahead of time so you’re within the timeline and you can have your choice of dates. Both our marriage license and marriage day appointments were Monday at 9AM - City Hall is known to be less crowded at this time.

[Optional] Vendors

Photography

Even though it was just Meet and I, we wanted to have a photographer there to capture the moment - both for our memories and to share with family and friends later. I reached out to many photographers in the Bay Area and a lot of the quotes we received were out of budget. For context, we had a full Indian wedding week in May 2024, so we were trying to make the legal marriage as low cost as possible. 

Initially, I was thinking about taking a chance on a newer photographer for a few reasons: 1) to give them exposure and a chance to develop their craft and 2) to save some money. Through my research, I’m happy I chose someone with more experience because SF City Hall is a bit of a tricky venue - it’s quite dark inside and there can be a lot of couples getting married at the same time, so having someone who can take charge and ensure you and your partner get the shots you want is super important.

We (well, mainly me because Meet let me run this whole thing) chose Rachel Levine Photography (https://www.rachellevinephoto.com/) and had Laura as our photographer. She was so friendly, made us feel comfortable in front of the camera and was able to get stunning pictures of us and the venue - definitely recommend. 

Makeup + Hair

My makeup skills are not the greatest and I wanted to look good for this special day! Since our marriage time was 9AM and they encourage you to get there early, I had quite an early ready time which made it a teensy bit more difficult in finding a makeup artist. I also wanted a very natural look. I found Nora through Instagram (www.glambeautybynora.com) and really liked her work! 

Flowers

It was my birthday a few days prior to our wedding so Meet and I upcycled the white and red roses to make a bouquet at home. If we had friends and family attending or ceremony, I definitely would have gotten an arrangement made by a florist but DIY’d it in the spirit of keeping costs low.

Day of marriage

I remember waking up super excited on the day of. As I mentioned it was an early start with my makeup and hair artist and we were ready by 7AM. We took a Lyft to City Hall and got there by 8:30AM - our photographer wanted us to get there early to take pictures while the venue was empty as well as get checked in and ready.

In between taking pictures, having our ceremony, and getting a few more pictures taken afterwards, the morning flew by! Before we knew it, it was 10AM and we were done for the day. Everything went super smoothly and I was so excited and happy to be legally married to my best friend 🩷

Marriage certificate 

About a month later, we headed back to City Hall (bright and early at 9AM - you should see the pattern by now) to get a copy of our marriage certificate and that was the last bit to conclude our legal marriage process.